Sunday, August 10, 2014

Feeling Witchy Womanly tonight?

The moon goes full each month at one specific minute in time, but she is technically full for 48 hours. You have 24 hours before the moment of fullness and 24 hours after to do full moon magic, which includes meditations for giving thanks for abundance and fruition (to amplify this vibration), the honoring and release of what has been completed in your life, and work that requires the intense energies of the moon in her fullest state. Some examples of the later would be cleansing your crystals, making moon alchemy water or even creating an epsom salt detox bath. Get creative during this time but make sure to take time for yourself to let go, detox and release. I like to do a full moon meditation during this time. I anoint my alter, smudge sage and light a white candle. Below I have given instruction on how I proceed to cleanse and activate my chakras through Full Moon Meditation. Instructions on How to do a Full Moon Meditation:

If at all possible find an area to stand or sit barefoot upon the earth.
Close your eyes or keep them softly focused and feel the moon beams bathing you in cleansing and purifying energy. If you are in the sunlight then go into your bed room make a clean and comfortable spot imagining the moon beams and soothing properties of the moon light. You can also charge a bath with Epsom salts and calming herbs like sage and lavender.
Breathe deeply. Feeling your lungs and diaphragm expand to it’s maximum capacity. Pause for a few seconds and slowly exhale imagining the diaphragm as “up flying” or pulling the diaphragm (your belly button) towards the spine. Imagine your inhale and exhale creating a figure eight or infinity symbol.
Imagine all areas of the body releasing tension starting from the feet going all the way up to the muscle of the face. Let go of all muscle tension. Surrender.
Inhale, imagine roots from the legs or the base of the spine diving down into the earth. Guide this energy up towards the very top of the head or the crown. Imagine a white lotus flower on the very top of your head and through this blossoming lotus flower white glowing pure light is pouring into your body. Covering like a blanket of snow all of the body seeping into each pore. Cleansing your inner being.
Feel comfortable bliss. Now dive down in the earth as exhale. Letting go of anything that no longer serves you. Anxiousness-Anger-Sadness.
Imagining the white light again drawing it from the earths core through you, up each energy center through your body and penetrating into the universes and endless stars.
Imagine bliss, peace and love showering again back down on the earth. That energy returning to you as cool, soft, angel white light wings surrounding you.
Placing your hands in prayer, lifting your hands to third eye center and bowing.
We end by letting our hands come back down to heart center.
No matter how you perceive the full moon whether a sacred day of reflection or just another passing day . In my opinion there is always something to be said about ancient culture’s traditions and reigniting our connection to mother Earth.

Sunday, July 27, 2014

I'm throwing 50 shades of Shade: in revelation to the trilogy and film

The ever so popular 50 shades of grey series caused a world wide stir among the "vanilla" based masses who read these books religiously like self proclaimed modern day soft porn. For true lifestyles it's a huge insult on the intelligence of safe sane and consensual players. The much anticipated upcoming film adaptation has American women on frenzy, along with the haunting rendition of "crazy in love " by Beyoncé has audiences who haven't read the trilogy excited for throwing their money away at the box offices!
If any truth goes into life imitating art, with the rumored divorce of Jay Z and BeyoncĂ©, this 2015 valentines day should be an anniversary for many to remember! 

As the book begins, Anastasia has somehow managed to complete four years of college, during which time she has had—despite being so physically attractive—no romantic involvement of any kind with anybody. In fact, she’s still a virgin. Also, she does not own a computer nor does she know how to operate one. She has no e-mail account, and seems to be only dimly aware of how the Internet works. At one point she says, quote: “Holy cow! I’m on Google!” That’s right, Anastasia uses the expression “Holy Cow!” Also, when she gets upset (which is often) she says: “Crap!” When she gets really upset, she says: “Double crap!” If you are with me so far you will catch on much sooner than others.

In short, Anastasia is a totally believable and realistic depiction of a normal twenty-one-year-old female American college student as she might be imagined by a middle-aged female British author who has lived her entire life in a cave on another planet like England.

So anyway, early in the book Anastasia meets the main male character, Christian Grey. He is average-looking.

Hah! I am of course joking. He is fucking phenomenally gorgeous man in the history of men. Lest we forget this crucial fact, Anastasia remarks on Christian’s hot-got-damness at least once every two pages. Her inner goddess repeated her tiny imaginary leotard over the hotness of this man.

To add to the stark realism of his character, Christian is also, at age twenty-seven, a self-made billionaire. He started a company called, realistically, Grey Enterprises Holdings, Inc., which employs thousands of people engaged in the field of doing some kind of vague business things in accordance with businessy-sounding orders given by Christian over his mobile phone as he stands around in various stylish settings with his worn but stylish jeans hanging loosely off his hips looking unbelievably hot. Christian also is an expert dancer, but doesn't have a pole anywhere in his palace, a piano player and glider pilot. Plus he has the ability to read minds and move so fast you can’t even see him.

No, sorry, that’s Edward from Twilight.

So anyway, Anastasia and Christian meet, and he is of course attracted to her, although because of her walnut brain she can’t believe this despite the fact that, as I have already noted, every freaking person she meets is attracted to her. Christian starts stalking her and pressuring her to engage in—and I do not mean this to sound in any way judgmental—regular sex. He wants to tie her up with ropes, handcuffs, shackles, tape, etc. He wants to blindfold and gag her. He wants to spank her, whip her, flog her, cane her, paddle her, put nipple and genital clamps on her, bite her and use hot wax on her. We know this because he asks her to sign a contract agreeing to let him do these things to her. Yes! To be fair, the contract clearly states that there will be “no sick shit involving fire play . . . urination or defecation and the products thereof” and “no acts involving children or animals.” AKA Basic rules: no blood sports no scat no animals or children, this has always been my basic principals Because that’s the kind of old-fashioned cornball romantic Christian is.

What do you think Anastasia does when she sees this contract? Do you think she gets herself a restraining order and an industrial-sized drum of pepper spray, which would be the response of a normal sane woman or reasonably intelligent cocker spaniel? Not our Anastasia! Crap no! She doesn't even get a lawyer to notarize the contract. She decides to go right ahead and get into a sexual relationship with Christian even though she thinks he is a moody weirdo super fucking hot pervert.

In this relationship, Anastasia keeps trying to get Christian to be a regular huggy-kissy-smoochy let's talk about this shit boyfriend, but he doesn’t want to do that. In fact, he doesn’t even want her to touch him because he has a Dark Secret in his past. What he wants to do, and keeps trying to get Anastasia to let him do, is tie her up and flog her with various implements, as she agreed to in the contract. She doesn’t want that, but she keeps seeing Christian anyway because she finds him so darned fascinating, in the sense of hot. If I were him I would sue her in the next book.

So the plot is: They have sex, she wants to smooch, he wants to flog, there’s a bunch of talking about this, they have sex again, she again wants to smooch, he again wants to flog, there’s a bunch more talking about this, and so on for several hundred word-filled monotonous  pages.

Finally, almost to the final end of the book, Anastasia decides to let Christian flog her, to see what it would be like. So he takes a belt and flogs her on the butt. Thats it! Then, in the dramatic climax to the story, the moment we have been building up to, Anastasia comes to a shocking, life-changing realization, which nobody could have foreseen in a million years: Getting flogged on the butt hurts. Yes! It’s a little painful if you don't build up the cherry however Shockingly Anastasia does not like it! Double crap!!

So she breaks up with him.

And then . . .

And then the book is over.

I’m serious. That’s the plot.

There are two more books in this series, titled “Fifty Shades Darker” and “The Third Fifty Shades Book That Was Required to Make It a Trilogy.” I assume these books bring these two bitch asses back together, as well as revealing the Dark Secret in Christian’s past. I don’t know because I haven’t read them, although I fully intend to do so in the future if the only alternative is a slow death by paper cuts.

But never mind the other two books. The first book was the big one, the one tens of millions of women could not put down. So to get back to my original question, from the standpoint of a woman sincerely trying to understand this fad: Why was this book so incredibly popular? When so many women get so emotionally involved in a badly written, comically unrealistic porno yarn, what does this tell us? That women are basically insane? Yes. Or women don't have a clearer understanding of a consensual S&M B&D relationship. So the moral of the story is get your face out of a book and put it in a lap. Look up submissively at your mate and get to understand your partners wants needs and desires. Then look down upon this partner and tell him your demands. SM-Leather-Fetish educational and social organizations consider the cornerstone of SM activity to be the guidelines: "safe, sane, and consensual." While it is possible to do any activity in a reckless and dangerous manner, SM is no more dangerous than skiing or other thrilling activities.
Safe is being knowledgeable about the techniques and safety concerns involved in what you are doing, and acting in accordance with that knowledge. Safety includes the responsibility of protecting yourself and your partner from STD (sexually tranSMitted disease) infection including the HIV virus.
Sane is knowing the difference between fantasy and reality. Fictional accounts of SM are often distorted for fantasy sake, and are not representative of real situations and relationships.
Sane also distinguishes between mental illness and health. A real distinction between mental illness and health is when a behavior pattern causes problems in a person[base ']s life. Washing your hands until the skin is peeling off, or so frequently that you can not otherwise function is a sign mental illness. SM, like any other behavior, can be a sign of psychiatric problems. However the vast majority of its practitioners find that SM enriches and promotes functionality in the other areas of their life.
Consensual is respecting the limits imposed by each participant at all times.
Consent is the prime ingredient of SM. One difference between rape and heterosexual intercourse is consent. One difference between violence and SM is consent. The same behaviors that might be crimes without consent are life-enhancing with consent.
Educate yourself sexually, for assistance on where to begin join my online monthly live radio show

Thursday, July 24, 2014

Pole dancers Bruised egos

I left this as advice for my pole sister in her Facebook newsfeed. I wanted to share it with you. 

Individuals with a tendency to bruise often should maintain a healthy lifestyle, including regular sleep schedule, stable emotional state, and proper balance between work and rest. The following steps help reduce the associated complications and prevent further bleeding:

Be careful in using over the counter products, and always consult your doctor before taking any medication or supplement.

Do not smoke, smoking decreases blood supply and delays tissue repair.

Be alert for any signs of infection, and take protective measures in cold and flu season.

Limit alcohol consumption, as excessive alcohol affects blood flow and clotting.

Avoid intense physical activities so as to reduce the risk of injury and bleeding. Though we sky dancers know that's out of the question so I suggest 3 days intense stretch 3 days of pole work or aerials of your choice and 1 day rest. I never really suggest dietary supplements however just

Eat a wide variety of foods to avoid dietary deficiencies. Since vitamins C, K, or B12, or folic acid are essential for blood clotting, the daily meals should include proper amount of whole-grain cereals and grain products, fresh vegetables and fruits, daily products, eggs, beans and peas.

Abnormal bleeding that causes excessive bruising is mostly due to heat in the blood that results in a reckless blood flow or vessel damages. Spicy, hot and greasy foods can easily create heat inside the body, thus they should be limited. Eat cool foods rich in vitamins. I'm not a physician or dietician. These are merely my suggestions after experiencing over 20 years of contusions, sprains and fractures. As a topical agent I use Woodlock oil and dit da jow, both available at you local  health food supermarket or Asian specialty store.

Monday, June 30, 2014

Pole dancers diet!

Curious how dancers maintain their famously svelte figures? Wanna know how grueling our daily dance routines, as well as what we eat to keep our energy up (without bulking up) throughout each long day? We work hard and eat super healthy (no surprise there). See what 3 days a week in the life of a pro dancer is like...
7:30 A.M.
I always start the day with a large glass of water and my vitamins (including fish oil, turmeric, and vitamin D). Breakfast is a bowl of Greek yogurt sweetened with honey and topped with organic berries and homemade granola. I also love starting the day with a warm beverage—usually an almond milk matcha tea latte or a cappuccino.

8:15 A.M.
I arrive at the studio about an hour before company class begins to roll out my back and legs, stretch, do some light Pilates, and Theraband my feet. Just spending some quiet time in the morning helps prepare me optimally for a good day of rehearsal.

9:15 to 10:45 A.M.
Our hour-and-a-half company class warms our bodies up for the day, but it also gives me a chance to technically keep improving outside of choreography.

11 A.M.
After class, I always eat a kiwi (for potassium and vitamin C), and if I have a long morning ahead of me, I’ll also nosh on some trail mix or a Kind bar. Company class is followed by three hours of rehearsal to prepare for the upcoming show.

2 P.M.
Lunch! Typically, it’s a prepared-ahead quinoa, veggie, and tofu stir-fry or a mozzarella and tomato salad dressed with this killer Super Greens and pistachio pesto recipe. I’ve been a vegetarian for about five years and eat super clean—no processed sugars or flours.

3 P.M.
Three more hours of rehearsal—this is why I keep lunch so light.

6 P.M.
My dancing day is done, and I am always in need of a snack. During the week, I am often either teaching yoga or going to school at night, so I’ll pack raw nuts to munch on or—if I’m organized enough—a delicious raw vegan power snack of some sort. On a night that I am free, I love to swim laps and hit the steam room afterward. Swimming is a great cardiovascular exercise that is easy on the joints and very meditative for me.

8:30 P.M.
Dinner during the week is usually simple: a salad loaded with veggies and two fried eggs over easy, accompanied by either hearty whole-grain bread and cheese or Nut Thins and hummus. Then I’ll unwind by watching TV, rolling out on my foam roller, and stretching so I don’t tighten up while I sleep.

10:30 P.M.
I know people always tell you not to eat late, but if I don’t eat before bed I will wake up at 2 A.M. hungry! It’s all about making the right choice. So every night before I go to bed I mix up kefir (which is like liquid yogurt and really good for your belly) with cinnamon and stevia. It’s delicious and helps me fall right to sleep.

7:15 A.M. 
I wake up and have water and coffee, but I actually don’t eat breakfast! Because I’m being active so early, I can’t have anything in my stomach. (On performance days, I will have some nuts or a cliff bar.)

9 A.M. 
I’ll head in and do a slow warm-up before class. I always do sit-ups and pushups, plus stretches to warm up my hips and my calves.

9:30 to 11 A.M. 
Class! We don’t get our schedule until two days beforehand and it changes daily, so it’s hard to have a regimented routine. It’s exciting in a way because your day is never the same!

11 A.M. 
I usually have a bag full of veggies—carrots and peppers and cucumbers—on hand to snack on before the next block of class or rehearsal, which lasts a few hours.

2 P.M.
Lunchtime! I follow a modified paleo diet—when we’re in season, I find it’s the best thing for my body, strength, and stamina. The gluten- and dairy-free aspects are the most beneficial for me, although I do have cheese on occasion.

3 to 6 P.M. 
More rehearsals. During the week, I usually don’t get in as much cross-training as I’d like. My favorite Vinyasa yoga class is in the middle of the day; if my schedule permits, I try to go. And on weekends, I’ll play catch-up with Aerial fitness classes for cardio and a special strength-training program called Ballet barre.

6:30 P.M.
Once I’m home, it’s time for dinner. My son loves to cook (and fellow athlete ), so he usually does his thing during the week. We always have some kind of protein and a vegetable—last night, we had a big salad with salmon on it and plantain chips. I love doing modified versions of non-paleo foods, like spaghetti squash. I’ve even made paleo calzones!

8 P.M.
I ice my ankles every night, no matter what, and sometimes I’ll walk around in stripper heels. I also just try to relax.

11 P.M.
Good night!

7:30 A.M.
In the morning, I’ll have a glass of water with the juice of half a lemon to take with supplements, plus a cup of green tea. (Sometimes I’ll have an almond-milk latte in my new espresso machine.) And I make a smoothie with greens, strawberries, blueberries, a half banana, a scoop of protein powder, 1 teaspoon of macha powder, 1 cup of almond milk, 1 teaspoon of chia seeds, and 2 tablespoons of hemp hearts. I drink half in morning and half after class.

9 A.M.
I’ll do an hour of PT exercises to warm up for class—mostly with a strength-training, alignment, and biomechanics focus.

10:15 a.m. to 11:45 A.M.
Company class…and I get to finish my smoothie!

Noon to 3 P.M.
Rehearsal, rehearsal, rehearsal. And usually a snack—parts of a Kind bar (like the dark-chocolate cinnamon pecan) or trail mix. I always carry food with me.

3 P.M.
Lunch is almost always a lean protein, like tuna or chicken, string cheese, and something like vegetables left over from dinner. We have to keep it light because we usually go right back to rehearsal.

4 to 7 P.M.
If we’re not rehearsing, I’ll do pole Pilates at or do a yoga class at the riverfront

8 P.M.
Dinner is a sizable serving of fish, chicken, beef, or pork plus a similar-size serving of a green vegetable and a sweet potato or quinoa. Or I’ll have a big salad with some sort of protein on it.

Before bedtime
For a sweet treat before bed, I’ll whip up a smoothie in my NutriBullet: a frozen banana, cacao, peanut butter, almond milk, cinnamon and a half scoop of protein powder.

Thursday, March 21, 2013


Pole Dancing Mama My new exercise routine. Yes, it’s true; I am a pole dancing mama. But let’s get one thing straight before I continue -- I do it for pleasure, not for profit. I don’t sneak out after I put my boys to bed and work in a dark bar to pay the bills. I have new respect for the girls who do, but it’s not for me. No, I’ve joined the latest fitness trend, and I stomp around in my living room, imagining that I resemble a brunette Pamela Anderson minus the big lips, big hair, and, well, big everything. So, not quite like Pam at all. In fact, as I pull my rather out of shape body up the pole, I realize that I’m not like any celebrity that may be a fan of pole dancing – celebrities which include Jennifer Aniston, Angelina Jolie, and Sheila Kelly, who started her own pole studio. Ever since I was kicked out of tap dancing at the age of seven, I haven’t acquired much grace – not that tap dancing was doing much for it in the first place – and it shows. I’ve always been more into the triathlon sports, although I never put them together to actually do a triathlon, so the whole idea of moving to a rhythm other than my breathing is rather new. It would be misleading to suggest that I am athletic; I’m not. Not since my second son was born and the days seemed to have less and less minutes in them – to the point that I’ve stopped changing out of my pajamas in the morning because it seems like I need to put them right back on for bed mere moments later. While not terribly active, I did manage to lose some of the 50 pounds that I gained in my second pregnancy, although not nearly as much on the day I gave birth as I had convinced myself that I would. I guess 35 pounds of fluids was a little unrealistic to hope for. In order to get rid of the remaining 39 pounds, I needed something that I could do at home and a little miracle thrown in wouldn’t hurt at all either. Without ever trying pole dancing at a fitness studio, or even swinging around a stop sign once or twice, I decided to buy a pole and see what would happen. If any fitness activity could put the yummy back into this mummy, I was convinced it had to be pole dancing. Dreaming of being a natural who didn’t get baffled by left hand/right foot/clockwise spin commands, I was more than a little disappointed. What the books don’t tell you and the videos don’t show -- apart from how confusing it is -- is that pole dancing hurts. If you are fully covered when you pole dance, which is how I started, you can’t hold on. If you try it while just wearing your workout gear, which I finally did with the curtains shut tight, your skin is guaranteed to pinch as you spin around. And the squeaking sound of flesh on pole is also a bit painful to hear. After the pinching comes the bruising, making me look like a battered wife – except who ever heard of armpit, ankle, and palm bruises? Then there are the aches from muscles that have never been worked this hard before. This pole should have come with a disclaimer. While pole dancing usually evokes a rather sensual image, it’s hard to believe it actually is. My bruised and aching body spins around, landing with great galumphing stomps and then just standing there, completely dizzy, as I try to regain my balance. It goes without saying that the size of my posterior, as it spins around, cannot be considered terribly appealing either. But after a couple of weeks, I’m starting to notice something. My lips don’t look bee stung and my legs still don’t look like they go all the way up. No, it’s nothing that extreme. I just happen to occasionally catch myself moving to the beat of the music that I have blaring, which masks the sound of my rather inelegant landings. Once my dancing alter ego – Sweet Danger – showed up when I was waiting to pick up my son from the school bus and said, “Hey, sexy,” to the tall dad with the rough around the edges look. Fortunately, I managed to stop Sweet Danger before she invited him over to see us on the pole. Also every so often, if the lighting is just right, I sometimes even concede that I don’t look too bad in some of the clothes that I’m now squeezing back into. It looks like my secret, unspoken dream of dancing in front of a crowd is going to remain unfulfilled for the time being, but I am making progress. I can do the “corkscrew” and the “front back hook". I can almost go upside down. I’m not quite a yummy mummy, but I’ve learned that the average male is as much of a perfectionist as I am, anyway. Here’s something else that I found out along the way -- pole dancing is as close to flying as I’ll ever get, and I don’t care who’s watching.

How to keep you pole clean

Is your pole dirty and slippery? Struggling to remove those stubborn stains? Fear not – we have the answers right here! Keep your pole looking shinier than shiny with The Pole Exercise Modern Girl’s Guide to Cleaning Your Dance Pole why your pole needs cleaning The short answer is it’s because of you – we shed and regrow our outer skin cells every 27 days, and some of this skin will inevitably end up coating your pole. You’ll also transfer a share of the grease and grime you’ve picked up during the day, along with creams, moisturizers and other beauty products. All of this combines to form a dirty and slippery residue on your pole. how often should you clean your pole? This depends heavily on how intensively you’re using it, but usually I’d suggest cleaning the pole once before you start, again mid-workout, and finally giving it a good wipe down at the end of your session. In my school I typically wipe down the poles every 20 minutes, but quite a few students carry their own towels too if they are working on challenging new moves. stop your pole from getting mucky There are a few things you can do to help keep your pole cleaner for longer, though most of the answers aren't quick fixes unfortunately. Practice makes perfect – If you’re just starting to pole dance you will probably leave quite a bit more residue behind because of over-gripping the pole. This is a perfectly normal response, and as you become more comfortable and confident with your pole dancing your grip will naturally loosen. Don’t sweat it – Sweating can make the pole mucky and slippery more quickly, as the day’s grease and grime released by your pores sticks to the pole. And if you get sweaty hands at the same time this will just compound the problem. There’s no perfect answer, but the best advice is often to take a short break before coming back relaxed and ready to nail that move! Grip products – Some pole grip aids work by coating your hands with sticky wax layer. If you find this rubs off excessively on your pole, try exercising without or experiment with one of the other products available. You can leave your boots on – Less skin contact usually means less dirt on your pole. Wearing a nice pair of boots will not only keep your pole cleaner for longer, but also give you some useful extra grip too. keeping your pole clean For a quick clean, just grab an old tea towel, towel or even t-shirt and rub the pole down. Anything made of cotton or a synthetic mix usually works well, though try to avoid fabric that’s too fluffy as this often leaves a residue of its own on the pole. Quite a few people use special polishing cloths give their poles that special showroom shine. Personally I’ve always felt that this buffing time could be better spent spinning round my pole, but if you do decide to get one make sure it’s not impregnated with wax or polish. cleaning products for your pole After an intensive pole dancing session, you may find that your pole needs a little more attention to restore it to its former shiny, grippy self. There are a number of cleaning products that can help, though do make sure they won’t damage your pole first. I’ve used most of these without any problems on my poles, but Vertical Leisure, for instance, advise against using acetone on their X-Poles and Pole Control Studios wants you to use brasso every 30 days and alcohol only on their Golden Goddess poles. Water – Water is always a safe option, and usually pretty effective too. Dampen part of a cloth and wipe firmly down and around the pole. Dry the pole off again and you’re good to go! Acetone – When my poles are in high demand during busy classes I often use acetone (nail polish remover) to help clean the poles. Because it’s a solvent, acetone is usually a lot more effective than water for cleaning a greasy pole. (It’s also great for removing grease and creams from the body – I normally use a small amount to dry my hands at the start of a session, and some of my students have even used it to clean moisturizer off their inner thighs!) As with water, apply a small amount to a cloth and rub your pole down. Make sure you give the pole a quick wipe to remove any excess acetone before jumping back on again. Alcohol – You can use alcohol on your pole in exactly the same way as acetone, though some people prefer it as it evaporates more quickly. Of course if your pole manufacturer recommends you don’t use acetone this may simplify your choice… Baby Wipes – Quick, clean and supplied in handy packs, baby wipes are great for getting grime off your pole. Baby wipes contain alcohol, which is what actually does the hard work of cleaning your pole. Do check they don’t contain moisturizer, or you’ll end up with a much more slippery pole than when you started! Glass cleaner – Some of my students swear by this to clean their poles. I’ve never used it myself though – do leave a comment if you have to let me know how you got on.